She's Already Two!

Well, I am fresh back from a visit to Pineville Louisiana.  My plan was to go down for a helping visit. My daughter needed help to paint some of the rooms inside the house they are renting.  We got permission from the Landlord and off we went to purchase supplies.  

They have been in Pineville for several years now.  My son in law is working for a college there and is in charge of the Choirs and voice programs.  He also has his Doctorate in Music Education and holds a Chair position at the college.  My daughter has received her Masters in ELA and has secured a position at a local Middle School as an English teacher.  She loves her work and the children and is a very good teacher.

My visit to Pineville was rather difficult this time.  I did not get the enjoyment that I expected to get.  My grandson has some behavior issues that are at times difficult to control.  They are working on getting him into some sort of counseling program where the whole family will need to learn how to deescalate his difficult moments and help him to make better choices.  These moments have affected the peace of the family dynamics, causing anxiety and exasperation for other family members.  My older granddaughter is in the 7th grade and progressing wonderfully!  She plays the clarinet, loves to bead and writes stories with her best friend.  Her characters in these stories are wonderful and her content is very well done.  I can see her being a best selling author someday.  She loves the Cottage Core style and of course is a great fan of the Annamae style.  She is quiet and introverted, much like her father.  She does a good job watching her sister and gets paid for caring for her when her parents have to go out for a while.  She is 13, and old enough to know what to do with the baby.  She helps her mother with many things around the house which is a great blessing.  My grandson, when not acting out, is a lovely and kind boy.  He loves anything Pokémon and I gave him a blanket of the older characters when I got there that he absolutely loves.  He has learned many things from his father who spent his younger years on a ranch in Circle Montana.  The last time he was there, he helped to string and repair fences.  He helps his dad outside with repairs and yardwork when needed as well.  He loves to ride the horses at the Circle ranch and enjoys playing on his tablet when he is allow screen time.

My daughter helps with the theater program at their church.  She works with the children of the church and they put on plays and other activities throughout the year.  My son in law also works as Director of an outside Choral program for Alexandria Louisiana.  He has been doing this for several years.  They have many performances around the area and he does a very good job leading the group.

I have recently turned 71 years old.  Last August I underwent open heart surgery for Hypertrophic Obstructive Cardio Myopathy known also as HOCM.  It is not curable but can be controlled.  In my case, my left ventricle was thick and pushed over into the mitro valve.  This made the space smaller and not enough blood was getting fully to where it needed to be.  I also was having SVTs which were periods of very fast heartbeats.  I believe it is called Supra Ventricular Tachycardia. Anyway, the surgeon said my blockage was in a difficult area and had to go through the Aorta to get to the spot where he had to trim the left ventricle.  It was a tricky surgery.  If he did not trim enough, I still would experience the symptoms, if he trimmed too much, I would have to have a pacemaker.  It was a long surgery and I had to be on a by-pass machine and a ventilator. I do not do well with anything over my face do to my PTSD issues.  I literally go into a major panic attack.  Also, if the air I breathe is too hot, I also panic.  Well, both of those factors were involved with my surgery.  When I started to wake up, I had a tube down my throat, into my airway and the air was hot. I couldn't tell them to cool down the air or take the mask off of my face so I panicked.  I started clawing at everything and had to be restrained.  I kept trying to say I was hot and I couldn't write it. The Chaplain who prayed with me before the surgery was there and told them, "She is saying she is hot!"  He was wonderful, from Africa I think but I loved him!  All that I could think was, 'this has to be what it feels like to be in hell'.  They quickly removed everything and I began taking in beautiful, cool breaths that calmed me down immediately.  I knew this had to be the breath of our Savior, Jesus Christ.  He had been there beside me through everything, guiding the surgeons hands, keeping me alive, loving me.  I began to praise Him and breathe His life giving air.  I thanked Him for keeping me alive and for His love for me.  I was in the ICU for about 5 days as my O2 levels were below 90, especially when I walked.  I went home after 5 days.  My boyfriend was able to stay in lodging that the VA offered for partners.  It was nice because he did not have to pay for his lodging or food. I was grateful he was there because I had no one else to help.  He stayed with me at my house until I was able to take a shower alone and then went home.

In December of 2025, we unfortunately broke up.  It was caused by many different factors.  Mostly, it was his mom.  He lived with his mom and dad as his dad was suffering from early onset dementia. We got along ok at first but her being a very staunch Democrat and me being a very stubborn Republican, we often bumped heads.  I tried very hard to ignore the little digs and rude comments she would make to me every time I went over to play cards with them. She would often insult my intelligence about things I knew for a fact were correct.  She would say things about my hair and sometimes yell at me. My boyfriend would just sit there and not defend me even when he knew I was right.  I just wanted him to tell his mother that she should not speak to me the way she did but he stayed quiet.  I mean, I understood that there was the issue of him living at home and he could probably get a great deal of wrath from her for standing up for me but I wanted to know he would support me if needed.  He also was making some very poor financial decisions and I am debt free except for my home. I did not want to marry him and have to take on his 75,000 dollar student loan that he had not paid a dime on yet.  He was involved in the Medicaid Expansion Plan and had Medicaid as a form of health insurance.  He was an Uber driver and considered essential during Covid so they allowed him to stay on the plan.  He had a bad knee that needed to be replaced and I kept telling him to get it fixed as Medicaid would not allow him to stay on that plan much longer.  He ignored me completely on this but kept complaining about it and the fact that it interfered with the things he wanted to do such as go on vacation, hike, walk at the park, go camping.  Well, one day he opened a letter from DPHHS and found out he was no longer covered.  These were the things that were red flags for me so I ended our relationship.  It was hard as he goes to my church but we are friends and we still help each other if needed for medical things.

I really haven't done to badly lately since the open heart surgery.  I can walk now without being winded, go up stairs, inclines, walk the store for groceries.  My health has been ok except for  falling off my front porch in February and breaking a rib and falling off the ladder at my daughters house and breaking my elbow. That happened on April Foolish Day and I knew not to get on the ladder but I wanted to finish the room before I had to go home on the 3rd.  I was sitting next to her eating etouffee at a  little hole in the wall restaurant right after the fall very much in pain.  I quietly told my daughter that after supper we needed to go to the ER. I told her my elbow was broken and she asked me if I really thought it was or was it bruised.  She took me and I came back with a splint on.  She said "Well, you can say I told you so if you want" but I just laughed and said, no worries.  I was stupid to get on the ladder when I clearly should have let you get that last little bit.

Back in February, right after the broken rib issue, I had to get a huge water leak repaired under the house.  It involved having to tear out the wall of the guest room that butted up against the bathroom.  It was a real mess for a couple of days but the plumber did a great job and I managed to find a great handyman to finish up some other projects that needed to be done here that I couldn't do because it needed a ladder to fix. He did all the finish work and put the guest room wall back together, painted it, painted the upper part of the bathroom that Bath Planet didn't do after redoing the bath.  He put up a really nice railing on the front porch and installed my back door Ring Camera and Solar Power attachment. He has agreed to paint the living room when I am ready to do so.  I ended up purchasing my ex-husbands 2011 Yukon Extended SLT after he passed away in February 2025.  He hadn't taken very good care of it so I took it to the GMC dealer and had a high mileage inspection done on it.  I had over 7,000 dollars of work done initially and a little more done recently.  The dealer said I should be able to get some good life out of it now.  He said even if the engine fails later on, the bones are excellent and I can put a new engine in it.  It has a ton of bells and whistles as it is the luxury model so I am slowly learning about it.  I love that truck to death!! It purrs like a kitten now and I plan to get a little trailer to putz around the state with. It's just me so I can go with one of the sleeper trailers with the galley in the back. Easy to pull for sure.  I may take my son to a few places as well.  We want to go on a cruise to someplace warm when all the silly shenanigans get done with the country.

Well, I have talked enough!  Y'all are caught up and I have things to do that I have been putting off.  Please take care this summer everyone.  Montana had very little winter moisture so we will be on high fire watch.  Oh, by the way, after my ex passed, his sons inherited the Freeman Cabin.  I was able to use it for 15 of the 17 years of marriage.  They did some work to it and now it is up for sale.  Look for adds near Roundup Montana real-estate if you want to purchase 20 acers of land and a real piece of Montana History.  The Montana Freemen spent 3 years there before they moved on to Jordan and had the Jordan standoff.  The cabin actually had a name.  It was called Redemption Township and was considered by the Freemen to be a "Sovern Country!"  I wish I could have purchased it but I wouldn't have been able to take care of it.  Take care everyone!  Cheers, Freedancer.   

We Have a New Baby!

 Well hello!  Long time no post!  Much has happened since 2022, some good some bad.  The good is that my beautiful daughter had a new baby on 4 January 2024!  Her name is Naomi and she is a peach! 

     I am going on three years in my new home.  I have done a great deal of improvements to this home.  After getting stuck in the bathtub in late 2021, I made arrangements to have a bathroom remodel which was completed by Bath Planet.  Let me tell you, if you want a project done right, go through Bath Planet.  I took out the tub shower combo and put in a beautiful walk-in shower with a bench seat.  It turned out pretty nice and I love it!  It is so nice to have grab bars and a bench seat.  I have experienced dizziness recently from a new heart condition and being able to sit down or hold on so I do not fall is so stress relieving. Since my home is older, the plumbing was not up to code so they had to go the extra mile to make sure it all matched the code rules.  Prior to the shower redo, I had 10 feet of pluming under the house rebuilt as it had a crack in the pipe.  That was a difficult but necessary job.  Then, I indoor/outdoor carpeted my outside patio space.  It is covered so it looks awesome.  I had two windows replaced in the back of the house in 2022. Lynrich had a special for veterans going on and I signed up in 2021.  They were so backed up that I had to wait approximately one year before they could get to it. It was so worth the wait.  Lynrich also replaced some gutter in the back that went around the patio.  The people that did it before put up the gutters but had the roof running under the outside edge of the gutter and when it rained, the water missed the gutter and ran down onto the patio.  So all of that has been repaired.  In 2003, I signed up for a 19 month Same As Cash with Anderson Windows for a new Bay Window on the front of my home.  It is beautiful and my two cats love watching the birds come to the bird feeders near the window.  They did a fantastic job and the final bill is not due until 2025.  I will have it all paid off in January of 2005. I have already paid it down by 75 percent.  I financed through Green Sky Financial and they are really great to go through and easy to work with.  That new window makes my Livingroom look much larger and I get some really nice light in the morning. My next project is to remodel my kitchen as it is old 1950's style and I have to have the bathroom repainted by a company as I am unable to do much climbing anymore. 

     My father passed away on March 27th 2020 and we had to wait until Covid was over to bury him in the Veterans Cemetery in Washington State. Unlike my son who had family around him when he passed away from pneumonia and Prader Willie Syndrome in 2018, my father passed away alone, in a nursing home. No one was allowed in due to the Covid.  He was 92 years old.  My step-mother passed away in April of this year and now my brothers and I are working on selling my dad's house.  We hope to get a fair amount for it as it is situated on the edge of a small runway in Yelm Washington.  He had two hangers built with the house to house his three planes.  After dad passed away, my younger brother was gifted one of the airplanes since he was the one in the family who obtained his pilot's license.  I started a second home business with Etsy.  It is called Pamelas Treasure Cove.  I sell items that I make and also vintage items that I find.  It has done pretty well so far.  The site on Etsy is etsy.com/shop/pamelastreasurecove.  If you would like to check out my other shop it is etsy.com/shop/freedancer. I sell photos and hand made jewelry in this shop.  You can also find my shop on the internet under Jewelry Designs by Pamela.

     Healthwise, things are pretty bumpy. I was diagnosed with Hashimoto's Disease which was causing my body to attack my Thyroid.  It has been hell trying to adjust the levels as I am very brittle and just as it seems that we finally have it sorted out, the numbers go the opposite direction.  This is considered an Autoimmune disorder. This disorder led to another Autoimmune disorder called Prurigo Nodgularous which is a skin disorder that causes arms, legs and torso to break out into very itchy red bumps. When a person scratches them, sores develop and can cause the immune system to get disturbed.  There is no cure and no one knows why it happens.  This disorder caused another Autoimmune disorder to attack my second layer of skin, causing large blisters to form on the lower torso, scars, legs, arms and face.  It is called Bullous Pemphigoid and there is no cure.  It is very difficult to control as blisters formed around my Stoma where I have my Ileostomy flange and when I changed out my flange to a new one, the tops of the blisters were pulled off causing very painful ulcers that are very difficult to heal.  I wasn't able to get the Ileostomy hardware to adhere to my stomach which was causing a leakage issue.  So here I am dealing with three autoimmune disorders that have no cure.  Then it was also diagnosed recently that I have a heart condition called Hypertrophic Obstructive Cardiomyopathy. This is a hereditary issue.  Someone in my family line had it and it was passed on to me.  I was having horrible dizzy spells, periods of breathlessness and fainting with racing heartbeat.  It is when the left ventricle of the heart obtains a thickened wall.  This in turn causes the heart to stiffen and struggle to pump the blood up into the body.  When it pushes harder to pump it causes the wall to push over into the mitro valve causing a blockage. If you have ever heard of young athletes dropping dead on the football field or basketball court, this is what normally causes it.  It is treated by medication, Alcohol Ablation or Myectomy surgery which is open heart surgery.  They started me on medication but I am unable to tolerate them raising the dosage.  It causes me to pass out so I will be going to the Rocky Mountain VA Regional Medical Center in Aurora Colorado to be seen by a Cardiac Surgeon and if they cannot fix the issue there, I will be referred to Mayo Clinic in Minnesota where there is a specialized clinic available.

     One of the good things that has happened is that I now have a very nice boyfriend.  He is a Uber/Lift driver here in Billings Montana.  We have been dating since February 14th of 2021.  We had a 6 week break close to October of 2021.  It was a time where I felt I did not deserve to be treated nicely and because of that mindset we backed off.  He dated another lady for 3 weeks but came back around December of 2021 and said he didn't want to be away from me.  I needed that 6 week break as I had to break the abusive cycle that my brain was in. I spent alot of time talking to God and He ministered to me, letting me know that I was worthy of being with a nice man who didn't beat me, treat me cruelly, treat me like a roommate or abandon me like my last husband did.  I guess you couldn't really say we totally broke up during that time as we went to church together and sat by each other most of the time.  Anyway, the end result is that I broke the abuse cycle and realized that I didn't have to worry about him trying to kill me like my last two husbands did. We are pretty much made for each other though.  He has a bad knee on the same side as mine and has had one knee repaired.  We both have heart issues that are similar.  He recently had an ablation procedure that took his heart out of  Afib and he is feeling much better.  Every Sunday and Thursday night we play cards with his parents and it has become quite a competition between us and them. His family is the nicest and sweetest family I have ever met.  They are all Christians and family is important to them.  We celebrate all the birthdays at a restaurant of their choosing. We take a cake and have a great time.  I never had this sort of relationship with my family growing up. From the time I was three until I was 15, my father beat me violently and often.  My mother was afraid to leave and he never laid a hand on my brothers.  After growing up with that and trying to hide the bruises and welts from the leather belt, I was glad to graduate High School and go into the military to get out of that situation.  Unfortunately, that relationship set the precedence for the rest of my relationships with my 4 husbands.  All of them were abusive physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. All of them just like my dad. My church has been such a joy for me.  My first date with my boyfriend was at church.  What a great place to meet someone.

     Well, my daughter and her husband are in Center Point Louisiana. He received his Doctorate and took a teaching position at  Louisiana Christian College.  My daughter received her Masters Degree at the college as well. Her husband has a chair position and is in charge of the Choral Division.  He also teaches the specialty Choirs and does Ear Training and Voice.  The students appear to like him and my daughter will be able to teach there as well or take a Principal position or administrative position.  For now though, she is a mom to three adorable kids!

     I guess that's it for now.  I haven't traveled much except to go home to my 50th class reunion which was fun to do.  I was able to stop and see my step-mother and get my Shirley Hugs.  It was the last time I saw her as she passed away in April the next year.  I hope everyone is doing well.  Hang in there and don't worry about the state of the world.  God didn't put us on this earth to worry.  If He can take  care of the birds in the field just think what He can do for you!  Cheers!  Freedancer

    

Another Year Has Come and Gone

Hello to everyone!  Here we are starting 2022!  I was beginning to wonder if I was even going to make it this far but it looks as though the good Lord decided He wasn't finished with me yet.  A lot has gone on in the last year and much of it was very exciting!

In 2021 the time came to renew my lease for the apartment that I had been living in for the last three years. I was totally in shock when they presented me with what they would be charging me!  Since it was pretty outrageous, I decided I didn't want to put that much money into someone else's pocket so I made the decision to purchase a home of my own.  I spent a great deal of time choosing one and every time I put in an offer, someone else undercut it.  This was pretty frustrating but expected as the housing market has been so on fire.  I finally decided I would look at a few that had been on the market for longer than a few days LOL!  I kept going back to a sweet little home on the west end of town that I kept putting at the back of the list.  It was 1200 square feet and all on one floor.  The house had new siding, roof, furnace,  air conditioning, water heater, windows and electrical.  It sat on a double lot and the location was excellent.  I put down an offer which was immediately accepted and I was off and running.

The home was passed over because it had cosmetic work to be done.  I closed on the home in April 21 and promptly began the process of painting and laying carpet.  I purchased all new appliances which included a washer and dryer, new fridge and new stove.  The stove, water heater and furnace are all gas so it would be relatively inexpensive utility wise.  However, the water turned out to be quite pricey.  I needed to use the water as I wanted to ger the yard in shape.  I did not have a garage, only a carport and for now, it is alright.  I know at some time in the future I will need to look at closing in the carport in or building a one car garage.  It has been brutally cold here in Montana this year and a couple of times the car struggled in spite of having a new battery.  

One very exciting item that my home did have was a well.  I discovered it after moving in.  There was no well listed when I purchased it.  My new neighbor has one identical to it and she stated that I had one as well.  I contacted a landscaper to come over and get it up and running and 3,000 dollars later, I had water!  I had the water tested and it came back relatively safe but has Coliform bacteria.  This is easy to eradicate by shocking it with a bleach formula.  So far, I am only using it for watering outside which is where most of the cost was coming from.  After using it for a month, my water bill dropped from 111.00 to 54.00.  This coming year, I will get a much better idea as to how much it will help.  One good thing is that I can run the water through a Berkey water purification system and it will render the water safe to drink.  This is huge as it gives me a 2nd water source in case of an emergency.  I bartered labor with a friend and we got the rooms in the house painted.  Someone who used to live there had painted them turquoise and red.  Yikes...not what I imagined at all!  We spent about two weeks on this and they turned out really nice.  The home has a storage building out back and we sealed the bottom of the floor edge with caulking to prevent seepage and painted it as well.  It turned out beautiful and after putting up shelves, I moved all my storage there.  I purchased a freezer and made a cozy place for it in the storage building and it works wonderfully.  I also purchased a medium size dorm refrigerator that can be run off of my solar generator.  I also have a small refrigerator as well that is not hooked up yet.  I wanted things that I could run off of my solar generators incase we lost power for some reason.

Earlier last month, I secured a sweet deal to install solar panels on my roof.  I spent hours and hours researching everything I could on the system.  The company is Purelight Power and they are based out of Medford Oregon.  They decided to set up an office here in Billings as well.  I am to have them installed this year after the weather gets better.  However, they have run into a structural problem so I am not sure if I will be able to have it or not.  If they can make the patio cover and beams stronger, they will continue, if not I will have to give this up.  Either way, I am ok but I would really like to have the solar power.

A few weeks before Christmas I was measuring a window for lights when I missed the bottom step of the ladder and broke my leg where the Tibia fits up against the knee.  I had to be non weight bearing for 10 weeks!  Crutches are a real pain to use and I couldn't use my scooter that I used when I broke my foot a few years back.  It was a difficult 5 weeks at first.  Then, I had a healer pray for my leg when my son was at church.  They and the church prayed it would be healed.  The next week I noticed that the pain was mostly gone and that I could put my weight on my leg just fine.  Two weeks ago, I ditched the crutches completely and have had no pain at all.  I can walk just fine and my knee feels better than it has felt in many years.  Prayer is wonderous and God is outstanding in my book.  I had really been on a bad luck streak but it has started to turn around now.

Hopefully we can all put the last two "train wreck" years behind us now.  This awful pandemic has ruined the relationships between people.  The ones who have suffered the most have been our children.  They need to be physically in school.  It teaches them the skills of dealing with people and helps them to gain emotional stability.  They need to be around their friends and they need in classroom teaching.  People spend too much time being afraid.  God didn't give us a spirit of fear.  We need our churches and people need to work and feel accomplished.  Making the vaccine mandatory is unconstitutional and takes away the peoples ability to choose what is best for them and their families.  We should be able to control our own lives and destiny and no one should force their control upon us in any way.  I have made the conscious choice to not take the vaccination in any way, shape or form.  It is my body and my choice and I will not comply with any of the government mandates that the president forces upon us. I believe Psalm 91 and I know that the Lord will protect me.  Have I had Covid, yes I have.  I had it approximately three separate times and I am still here.  Is it difficult? Yes, it is no fun to have but each time I do have it, my antibodies are strengthened to fight it off.  

I am optimistic about our future.  I see the signs of Christ's return more and more each day.  I hope He comes very soon.  This earth is becoming more and more like Sodom and Gomorra each day.  Soon, it will become very difficult for honest and believing Christians to find a safe place to shield their loved ones from the evil smoke that is slowly drifting across every inch of the earth.  I encourage all of you to make a survival plan for the upcoming trials and tribulations that are coming our way.  Don't wait until it is here, do your preparation now.

Well that is my update for now.  I will continue to blog when I can and share it with all of you.  Please take care of yourselves during these uncertain times.  Cheers, Freedancer      

                                                          Much Has Happened Since 2018

    Well hello everyone! It has been over two years since I have blogged and I thought I best get to updating!  After healing up from my second emergency surgery in February of 2018, I ended up leaving my husband and moved into my own apartment.

    This decision was not at all easy to make.  I was going on 14 years of marriage and had invested a great deal of my life into this marriage.  I tried very hard to make things work.  I went to counseling with him and things began to get better but our counselor left her practice to have a baby and everything went back to the way it was.  My husband was not physically abusive to me but there are many other types of abuse that I suffered from.  He was verbally, spiritually and mentally abusive.  I was screamed at, ignored, controlled and had a great deal of mental stress.  He pretty much controlled everything I did and said.  We went where he wanted, ate what he wanted, vacationed where he wanted and he constantly berated my home business.  Then, one day I was watching my son in law while he performed music at Boston College of Music on the internet.  My daughter was streaming it to me.  My husband had been upstairs all day and finally decided to come down to the living room.  He screamed at me to get off the internet, that he paid for it and would decide when I could be on.  This was far from the truth as I paid half of all the bills.  I asked him to please wait until intermission and I would talk with him.  He flew over and got right in my face and said "Do you know what you are?  Your're a dirty little pig!" 

    This comment hit me at the core of my heart.  I had spent almost 15 years cleaning, taking care of the furniture, kitchen, bathrooms and scrubbing, vacuuming and dusting everything.  I had dealt with cigarette smoke every single day as he would not go out doors to smoke.  I was a very clean person and even with my ileostomy, I still was very clean.  He had not touched me sexually in 13 years.  I was literally devastated by what he said.  I stayed up all that night, praying and crying.  I was unable to sleep and talked my heart out to God.  I asked Him what I should do and when.  At 7 am in the morning the next day, my answer came, as clear as a person speaking to me.  God said He wanted me to move out of the home and give my husband one year to start making corrections to his behavior.  If nothing was accomplished in that year, I would be allowed to divorce.  I packed my things, got an apartment and a new job and moved out on June 1st 2018.

    It was around August 2018 and nothing has been worked on so I continued to work at my new job and get myself out of debt.  In late November of 2018, I was contacted by a doctor at a hospital in Everett Washington.  My middle son, who was in a group home there, was very sick and his outlook was grim.  I contacted my daughter and let her know right away.  It turns out she was getting ready to call me to notify me he was in the ICU.  It seems that he aspirated fluid into his lungs when he was asleep and it caused Pneumonia.  We were called to the hospital where we had to make the decision to turn off his life support.  He had no directive so I was the one to make the decision.  We gathered around his bed with my brothers and their wives and each of us talked to him, telling him how much we loved him and asked for forgiveness for anything we had done and told him we forgave him for anything he had done.  His father called from Montana and told him it was going to be alright, to go with Jesus.  I unplugged his equipment at 7 pm on the 17 of December 2018 and he went home to the Lord at 7:28 pm.  It was the hardest thing I ever did in my whole life.  After setting up the cremation and getting the death certificate, my daughter, my older son and I drove back to Montana.  In May 2019, we had a memorial service for him and in July of 2019, I placed most of his ashes into a mausoleum near my home.  He was a very large person so some of the ashes did not fit the state urn.  I put some of them in a small urn and flew to Boston in October of 2019 to place some of his ashes in the Atlantic Ocean with my daughter to help me.  We put some of his ashes into the water at Holter Lake Fishing Access where he liked to fish with his Dad.  I put the remainder of his ashes at our family cabin in the San Juan Islands when I went up to Washington State for my father's funeral on August 28th of this year.  My dad had passed away on the 29th of March 2020 and my divorce was final on the 27th of March 2020.  I am into my third year here at my apartment on the west end of Billings Montana.  I ended up giving my husband 2 years before I filed.  I found a wonderful church where I have been making great strides in my healing process.

    So for now, I am concentrating on getting "me" into a better place and getting closer to the Lord.  My husband and I are friends and he has told me he is very sorry for what happened but both of us have decided that there is no turning back.  In June of 2020, I was totally debt free and when my father's estate is settled, I will have enough to purchase a home of my own.  I will be consulting a Christian Financial company to help me to make good decisions with the remainder of my inheritance after I pay my Tithing and purchase my home.  I plan to go on a volcano tour before I become too old to enjoy traveling.  I have a passport that wants to travel so I think I may go to Italy or Indonesia to see some of the volcanoes there.  I also want to do the Rivers of Europe Tour when all this Covid mess settles down.

    So that is my update on what has been happening in my life.  I hope to have more adventures in my life but I will no longer be seeking another spouse.  I did not pick well the last few times so that will be left up to God to pick for me.  If He want's me to marry again, He will need to find me someone that He wants me to be with and I can wait on His timing this time.

    I hope all of you are well.  Live your life to the fullest and don't look back.  Stay healthy and remember to put God first in your life always.  God is my best friend and the greatest father a girl could ever have.  Cheers!  Freedancer

It's 2018!

Hello everyone!  Welcome to 2018.  I can honestly say that I am glad 2017 is behind me.  It was the year from Hell for me!  Why do I say this you ask?  Well, read further and you will understand.

I had several issues that caused me heartache last year.  First of all, in June of 2016, I abruptly left my job.  There were so many restrictions placed on us as Case Managers that I could not effectively do my job and help my clients.  For the next 10 months I lived on my VA disability pay which was roughly $700.00 a month.  It was difficult to say the least.  I trimmed everything I could find, barely went out of the house and basically just Facebooked through everything.  I had thought of getting another job but I had worked for over 18 years in the field of Mental Health and another 15 years in the Air Force.  I just decided that I would retire when I turned 62 and that is what I did.

In February of 2017, I had some surgery to correct an issue that had been harassing me for several years.  I spent some time recovering from this and started to feel better.  Then on June 7th, I drove to the VA hospital in Salt Lake City for a scheduled throat operation to correct an obstruction that caused me to have difficulty using my CPAP at night.  My throat would close up when I breathed out my air and I would wake up 50 to 60 times a night which was making me exhausted.  I had some nasal surgery and a Uvula removal as well as widening my airway a little.  The doctor didn't sugar coat anything.  He warned me it was going to be very painful and he was not kidding!!  That was probably the most painful surgery that I have ever had in my life!  I was unable to swallow any of my medication so I ended up having it switched to liquid and put my pills in pudding and jello to get them down.  He said it would be 14 days of pain and that is exactly how long it lasted!

I finally healed up from that surgery and flew back to Salt Lake VA Medical Center on the 25th of June for my checkup.  I went the day before because I was to see the doctor and he only was there one day a month in the morning.  I stayed at the Ramada Inn in Salt Lake as they are very good to the veterans and always take good care of me.  The night of the 25 of June I walked the 5 blocks to the Village Inn for supper.  I had a good meal and was on my way back to the motel to turn in for the night.  One block from the motel a piece of concrete had sunken into the sidewalk and I did not see it.  I stepped wrong on it and it flipped me up, bringing me down hard on my left foot, right leg and landing me very hard on my stomach.  All of my things were tossed all over the road and I laid there for 15 minutes trying to get up but could not stand on my left foot.  Finally, after cars sped by, not stopping to help a nice Hispanic couple stopped and picked me up off the ground and helped me get back to the the motel where I got a cab to the hospital.  After several hours, I was sitting in the exam room when the doctor came in and explained that I had broken my left Metatarsal base bone in my foot.  They put me in a wrap and doctored up my cuts and bruises, gave me some crutches and told me to be back at 10:00 am the next day where the surgeon would evaluate me.  My throat checkup was also the next day at 3:00 pm.  I made it to the hospital with the help of the VA Van Service and the doctor ended up admitting me for surgery on the 28th of June.  I had to have a screw put in it and would be non weight bearing for 12 weeks!

Sitting in the hospital room, I called my husband in Billings and told him he would have to come down to pick me up and take me home.  He would have to be here by the 30th of June.  He was pretty worried and said he would be here.  The surgery went well and the techs and doctors were all laying down bets on how long it would take!  I was released on the 30th and sent back to the motel where I waited for my husband.  We would stay over night and leave on the 1st of July for the drive back.  The VA had given me so much equipment!  I had a walker, a scooter, a frame to go around the toilet to help me get up and down and a big, bulky boot that only came off to sleep.  I was not allowed to do stairs so my husband put a bed in the dining room for me and that is where I stayed.  It wasn't too bad but not using my foot was pretty hard.

On the 12th of July, I was eating supper when I had severe pain in my lower stomach.  I tried to ignore it thinking it was just gas or something but it got so much worse that I was screaming in pain.  I started throwing up and thought that I had Appendicitis so my husband rushed me to the ER.  After 5 hours there and many tests later it was determined that I was seriously ill and in grave danger of passing away.  I was rushed into emergency surgery.  I woke up in ICU with an ileostomy bag on my side and no lower bowel.  It had all died in less than 24 hours.  I was devastated! I cried for hours and even at one point in my drugged stupor, accused my husband of trying to kill me as he made the meal that started everything.  I remained in ICU for 2 1/2 days and then was moved to the surgery floor where I began to learn about my new partner who would be with me for the rest of my life.  I was sliced from my sternum to just above my pubic area and stapled together.  The stoma nurse came every day and talked with me about my new friend and how to care for her.  I spent many hours talking to God.  I wanted to know why this happened to me.  There were no problems like this in my family, not colon problems or cancer, absolutely nothing that would lead to this.  The doctor just shook his head and stated that he was unable to tell me anything except that the whole lower bowel had suddenly died.  I wanted to know why.  Had the VA not made me to go all the way to Salt Lake VA for a 5 minute check up and allowed me to have it here, perhaps this would not have happened.  I was pretty mad, then I was bargaining with God, asking him to wake me up from the bad dream I was in and make things OK again but it wasn't to be.  It has taken me this long to finally accept my situation and start to live my new life.  My diet is changed and everything I eat seems to make my new friend, whom I have named Maxine after Maxine Waters, very angry most of the time.  I have had 4 times back to ER with one admission due to a blockage in my stoma. Why do I call her Maxine you ask?  Well, it is just a wrinkled up old bag full of crap!  The name fits her perfectly!  The hardest part of everything was that I was still non weight bearing on my left foot and had my stomach cut open and stapled shut.  I could barely hold my self up at one point and for several weeks, it was a challenge to get around.  During this time I lost 2/3rds  of my hair and that was very depressing!  It happened because my body was under such stress from emergency surgery that it couldn't cope.  It has now started to grow back in but is still grey!

I have begun to feel much better now.  I am able to eat a little better but not much.  I have learned what to do when Maxine gets mad so that I can stay out of the hospital.  The surgery cost 78,000 dollars and the VA paid for the whole bill.  I am very glad that I had the VA!  My daughter and son in law moved to Boston in August.  He started school in September.  We stay in touch through Messenger on the computer.  I miss them so much that sometimes I cry when I am alone.  I want to see them but I know that it won't be for a long time.

I have started Dave Ramsey's financial plan to get out of debt.  Hopefully, it won't take me a really long time to be debt free.  I needed this a lot and as I begin my emergency fund and pay off my bills, I have gained a sense of empowerment which I have never had.  I pray that I can accomplish this task.  This year I made my granddaughter's birthday gifts.  It is a start at least.  I am paying cash for everything at this point.

I am hoping for a better year in 2018.  I am praying that the politics will settle down and that our economy can get even better.  I am praying for peace and also for my health.  I would like a year with no health issues to worry about.  I just want to become renewed in Christ and hope that He sees fit to bless me with a calm year that I can enjoy.  As always, Cheers!  Freedancer 

Sad Day in the Life of Freedancer

Hello all!  Today my daughter informed me that they are moving to Boston!  Needless to say, I am devastated.  It appears that my son in law has accepted a doctoral position with Boston University in the field of Choral Conducting.  They will be there for three years.

I have a knot in my stomach that won't go away!  I feel like I can't catch my breath and I have cried so many tears!  To not see my grand babies for three years seems like a lifetime to me.  I do not think I will have the money to go there anytime soon.  I feel abandoned, left out, lost with no direction.  It has been convenient to be able to go to Belgrade Montana to see them.  It was only two hours away and easy to drive, now they will be days away and due to money constraints, almost impossible to visit.

I don't think they have looked at the big picture here. Belgrade/Bozeman Montana was a nice, quiet place.  It had somewhat of a hustle and bustle of a medium size city.  My son in law was at the top of the earning level as teachers with a Master's level in music go.  I get it.  He wants to go further in his life, to make a better life for his family and do what he loves to do.  However, how can he justify putting himself into deeper debt in a more expensive city?  One cannot even get a decent 1 bedroom apartment in Boston for under a thousand dollars.  The safety of the city is another thing I worry about.  People here in Montana are fairly safe.  We don't have bombers who blow up marathons or refugees that threaten the very lives of the people who live there.  It is so close to DC and the White House as well.  What if it is attacked?  Will Boston be destroyed or damaged along with it?

My daughter wants to be a stay at home mother.  She has a teaching degree that she is using here but over in Boston, she will have to get a license to teach there.  They are a Conservative family.  Boston is one of the most Liberal cities around.  How will they survive in that environment?  Will they even be able to find a church that they will feel at home in?  Sadly, my daughter will have to go back to work and my grand babies will have to go to daycare.  They can hardly afford this now let lone, the high cost of daycare in a city like Boston.

It makes my daughter mad if I question these things.  I understand that they are looking at this as a new adventure and they want me to be more supportive but they don't seem to understand that I am losing my daughter who is my best friend and my beautiful grand babies. No more birthday's or Christmas Eve Brunches.  No more Halloween visits or Easter visits to share with them.  I had high hopes of taking them all to our cabin for a weekend or two but this is sadly not to be.

Now she wants me to come down and help them pack and clean the apartment.  I am finding that I don't want to do this.  It would just make the day they leave more painful.  To pack their things in boxes and help to put them on a moving truck would be like pounding nails into my heart.  How would I be able to stand this pain?  If I say I cannot come down, they will say I don't care and if I go down and weep as I put boxes in a moving truck, they will say I am not being supportive.  My heart is breaking in two and they are moving to the other side of my world.  It just doesn't seem fair some how. 

I officially retired on March 19th 2017.  I was so looking forward to going down to see them in the Summer and spending more than just a weekend.  I was excited to watch the children grow and to be part of their lives.  Now I will be unable to do this.  I am already feeling lonely.  With one son living in Washington State and my daughter soon to be across the United States, I will have no one except my one son who is here in Billings. The children will be 7 and 5 when I see them again.  My life is going to be so empty without them.  

To me, right now, right here, life is so very unfair!  As always, Cheers Freedancer. 

Things They are a Changin!

Well hello everyone!  A great deal has happened since my last blog so on your mark, get ready, here we go!

As of July 28th 2016 I am no longer employed with the Billings Montana Mental Health Center.  As the sign above clearly shows my feelings for the situation, I will enlighten you all on the circumstances.

Medicaid has taken it upon themselves to rewrite the duties that I and other case managers like me have been doing for many years.  Suddenly, we were no longer allowed to "assist" our clients with any of their activities of daily living such as grocery shopping, ensuring they made it to their doctor appointments, assist them in getting food boxes or even taking action if we suspected abuse toward them or by them toward someone else.  We no longer can transport them anywhere.  The higher ups stated that all those duties were to be done by a Rehab Aid but the problem is...the office has none and won't hire any.  This leaves the clients who have no car or money for a taxi or bus pass with nothing.

The other issue was that we were being told to be "creative" with our notes so that if we did end up doing some of these duties, we could get paid for them.  This basically set all of us up to lie about what we were doing with the clients.  I have never done well with change and after doing my job for the last 18 years a specific way and telling the truth in my notes, there was no way in hell that I was going to lie about what I was doing or watch my clients suffer because they had no help.

My only solution for this situation was to leave my job and that is what I did.  I am thinking about applying for a part time job to fill the next few months until I retire in April 2017 so I am hunting on the job sites and applying for different jobs.  I really do not want to work with mentally ill persons anymore so I am looking for more of a normal type of job.  At 61 I think I could do bagging at the grocery store and just work when I want to.

It pains me deeply to see the clients suffering now.  I had persons on my case load who had no money, no car and couldn't get a bus pass.  They desperately needed the assistance that I gave them.  To rip that service out from under them was wrong, cruel and frankly, really stupid.  I foresee the Mental Health Center falling apart in the near future.

I did very well at the Montana State Fair this year.  I made a Steampunk style chess board and designed the pieces myself.  I received a blue ribbon for this.  I also received some ribbons for photographs and other jewelry items that I put in.  I also was given a Best of Show for a piece of jewelry that I designed.  All in all, I was quite happy with it.

My whole life is up in the air at this moment.  I don't know what to do or how to do it.  I have lost 65% of my income and am living on my VA income only.  When all is paid, I have $88.00 left to last me until the next pay day so it seems that I will need to find another source of income very soon to last me until retirement.  I hope that I can find something fairly easy to do that I will value.  I had thought of going into business for myself as an independent case manager but by the time I even started making money, I would be retiring so that did not seem practical. 

I am getting the itch to head out of town and do some grandkid lovin or take a trip for a few weeks but I would need to get some income before I do this.  However, I really would like to see my daughter and the children.

So folks, that is my story for now.  I'll update as things go along but for right now I am dirt poor and feeling it.  As always, Cheers!  Freedancer

He Was Murdered!!!

Hello everyone!  Some of you will not like what I am going to say here today and I am truly sorry about that.  However, it must be said and everyone out there must pay close attention.  There was a very important man who was murdered last Saturday.  His name was Antonin Scalia and he was a Supreme Court Justice.

Now I know what you are saying.  He died naturally and that is that.  Well you can all think again.  He most certainly was murdered and the President of the United States had his dirty hand right in it up to his evil elbow!

There were too many important votes coming up that the Justice most likely would have affected and there are people in the United States and all over the world that wanted to see those votes turn a different way.  What better way to do it but to rid the court of one of the steadfast conservatives?

This man whom we call our president has an evil agenda and that agenda is to take away our freedom as we know it and turn this country into a Socialist nation.  He undermines the rights of Christians in favor of Muslims and people of the "other" persuasion.  He does not want us to have our first or second amendment rights and what we work day in and day out for he wants to give to those who do not work at all.  Those citizens who basically "suck off the troth".

President Obama is an opportunist.  He saw the chance to take Justice Scalia out and he took that chance with little or no regard for anyone else but HIS own agenda.  Don't let anyone tell you this low life scum didn't have anything to do with this situation.  They would be lying to your face.

Congress now has a job to do.  It is to stonewall Obama every step, every turn and every move he makes.  He must not be able to have anyone nominated to take over Scalia's post.  It must wait until the new president takes office.  Our lives depend on it.  If another liberal judge gets in, life in this country will change forever.

It shakes me to the center of my soul to know that someone in such a position of power can just snap their fingers and kill a sitting justice like that.  Obama may have not "pulled the trigger" but he certainly "gave the order".  No,  that dear man did not die of natural causes.  He was murdered in cold blood, in his sleep, to keep him from voting.

Say what you will about me but mark my words.  The truth will come out because God is angry and when He get's angry, things get discovered.

Rest in peace Justice Scalia.

As always, Freedancer

Just Call Me Leftie!

Well hello everyone!  Freedancer here catching everyone up on the latest news!  On the 12th of Jan I had the first of several surgeries that are on the books to be accomplished.  Right now as we speak, my dominant right hand is in a very attractive bright pink cast.

I underwent the first of my CMC joint surgeries and am happy to say it went very well.  The pain was actually quite minimal but the real challenge was learning to do everything with my left hand.  It is amazing how difficult that simple action is.  Don't let anyone tell you it is easy because it is not!

I was lucky to have a fantastic hand surgeon, Dr. Smith, from the Billings Sports Medicine Clinic. I was very worried that when I was under the troughs of anesthesia that I would yell out "Danger Will Robinson or Oh the pain...the pain" but lucky for me I behaved myself.  I also was lucky to have the anesthesiologist that I had for my shoulder surgery in 2012.  I was so happy to see him.  I will be in this cast for 4 weeks and then the VA will take over my PT.  I have everything great to say about the VA.  The new ARCH program paid for my surgery for me and they were just fantastic!

My beautiful daughter came up from Belgrade and assisted me for 4 days.  She brought my little grandson with her.  He is so sweet and getting so big!  He is 7 months old and has eyelashes to die for!  I've been off work for two weeks now and of course all that time was vacation so there goes this years vacation.  I go back to work this coming Monday part time and the next Monday will be full time.  I think I am ready and my retired hubby said he enjoyed having a taste of what my retirement will be like in a couple of years but is ready to dive back into his solitude again!

We took a trip up to our cabin getaway yesterday and I thought it would be a good time to put the new feather mattress topper on the master bed.  As I was taking off the blankets, I noticed a bunch of the mouse poison pellets down in the corner of the blankets.  It  dawned on me and I finally knew where all the mouse pellets were going, the little ratturdes were bringing them all the way up from downstairs and stashing them in our bed, to get back at us!  Those are some pretty smart and obviously very vindictive rodents! Well, I got rid of it quickly after I showed my hubby what was going on.  The war is on now and it wont be pretty!!

The break at the cabin was kind of nice.  We ate pop tarts, drank coffee and watched North by Northwest on the DVD player.  Great movie!  So that is my story for now.  I am actually typing with one hand and 4 fingers and not doing too bad.  Cheers!  Freedancer

2015 is Gone and 2016 has Arrived

Hello everyone!  Well, 2015 is history and 2016 has made its entrance.  I wonder what God will bring to us this year?  For me, I was able to spend some time at Christmas with my daughter, son in law and grand babies.  How quickly they grow!  My granddaughter is already on her way to being age 3 and my grandson is 6 months old.

For two days we were privileged to have them here.  Since I had to work on the 24th, we had out Christmas on the 23rd.  I was able to have the kids to myself for several hours on the 23rd while the kids went shopping.  I so enjoyed them!  Little baby Micah is such a sweet baby!  I cuddled with him and could hardly put him down the whole time.  Lydia was told that she had to take a nap before we opened up Christmas gifts.  When I went downstairs to check on her, she was still awake.  I explained that I had spoken with Santa Claus and he said that she had to have a nap before he would put the very special gift that he had brought to her under the tree.  I left for about 15 minutes and she fell fast asleep.

This year, I had been collecting things to put into a very special doll house for Lydia.  We got the house over the net from a family in Florida.  While waiting for it to arrive, I had spent a lot of time purchasing some very special trolls to go in the house.  I had many of them when I was a child.  They had the most adorable scrunched up faces and fly away hair of many colors!  The only problem was is that they were naked!  I spent some extra time finding some clothing for them and lots of furniture to put in the house, making sure it was large enough to prevent choking. I got it all ready and purchased a small suitcase from the local Good Will for Lydia to put all of her little toys in when she was not playing with the house.  I them wrapped them all carefully and put them in the laundry room.

We opened all of our gifts and we were all sitting there in the living room thanking each other for the thoughtful things they purchased for us.  I then looked over a Lydia and asked her if she was ready to have the very special present from Santa.  Her eyes got big as saucers and she was grinning from ear to ear!  I told her to close her eyes tight and we put the gifts on the floor by the tree.  That little girl lit up like a firefly in Summer!  She was so excited about the house that she barely could keep from screaming.  Of course she had not ever seen a troll before but fell in love with them.  There were baby trolls, sister and brother trolls, mommy and daddy trolls and a very special grandmother troll.  She had so much fun putting the house together and didn't want to put it away when it came time to pack up to go to her other grandparents house in the Billings Heights.  The suitcase thing was a great help.

After they had headed out to Grandpa Bears house, we sat in the rubble of papers and ribbon and thought about all the excitement of the last two days.  I wouldn't have given it up for the world.  It was all it should have been and more.  My hubby's sister was on her way over with her gifts and we quickly cleaned up the living room for the next round.  The kids would be headed to Circle Montana to see his parents tomorrow and they would remain there until after the 1st of January.

I took a few moments to think about the true meaning of Christmas.  Sure, it was great to see all the family and to watch the kids faces light up at the presents and tree but how much had I thought about the little baby in the manger who was the true Light of the world?  I was humbled by the feeling of gratefulness at what Jesus had done for me so many years ago.  How I longed to just touch his robe like the woman did when he dragged the cross through the city to the spot where he would be crucified.  She had such faith!  I want that kind of faith!  I want to know that when I close my eyes for the last time that when I open them I will see the face of God looking back at me.  This remains my desire and will be my desire until I draw my last breath on earth.  Please!  If you do not know Jesus as your personal savior, please ask Him to fill your soul this very minute!  Heaven will be a wonderful place and to see you there will make even more wonderful.  It's a free gift and no amount of money or other wealth can pay for it.  All it takes is for you to tell Jesus you believe in Him and ask Him to save you.

In another week I will be having surgery on my right hand to repair the CMC joint.  I have researched this carefully and watched a video of it.  If you are to have this done, don't watch the video...it is somewhat brutal!  However, the success rate is an impressive 96% so I am fired up and ready to tackle this challenge. The recovery time is quite lengthy so I will not be getting a vacation this year again unless my hubby pays me for it!  I hope to get completely well as I need my hands to work on my jewelry and other crafts.  My part-time business has done very well this year.  I even accomplished a custom made bracelet for a client and it turned out really nice.  I have sold quite a few photo's, especially the ones that I have assigned numbers to.  I am now armed with a fantastic new camera which can do most anything.  Funny story here was that my last camera that I purchased after I broke the one on vacation, quit working.  I sent it in for repair and was told it would cost as much as I paid for it.  I ended up retiring that one and purchased the newest one.  I ran across the old camera in the craft cupboard and put new batteries in  it just for giggles to see if it would work.  Well, it did work and now I have a back-up camera which is just fine with me!

Well, that's all for now everyone.  I will write more again later on.  I hope you all had a wonderful Christmas and wish for all of you  a fantastic new year!  Cheers!  Freedancer

Last Vacation of the Year was Our First!

Hello everyone!  Well, we managed to get a vacation in for the year even if it was short.  We traveled to the Southwestern areas of The Colorado National Monument, Canyon Lands National Park and The Black Canyon of the Gunderson.  All of these areas were breathtaking to say the least.

After spending most of the Summer months working on apartments and watching a new grandson enter the world, we needed a break.  I ended up having to take leave without pay which wasn't too bad but did put a little dent into the finances.  We made it work however, as I needed the time away from the job which I had been at steady for over a year without a vacation.

I don't see how anyone in this world could see as much beauty we saw on this trip and honestly say there is no God!  Everyday I saw more and more fascinating and awe inspiring country.  The colors, the makeup of the lands and the mysteries that they held were intoxicating.  I found myself thinking of how the deep valleys and tall mountains were formed and  I learned of the explorers who traveled down the undiscovered rivers.  I just sat motionless, there in the soft breeze, listening and taking in every moment.  I heard the voice of our loving God telling me, "This is the world that I made for you. Love, listen and learn all that is here for you".  How I love Him!  How grateful I am that He loves me!

My husband's illness is fairly under control now.  However, he did have a few periods on this trip where he just stayed in the car while I hiked the trails out to the view points.  He wishes he was up to hiking again but realizes that those days are probably a dream.  He tires now in about 4 hours.  He used to work and play for hours and still have energy but this unfortunate deck of cards are the ones he was dealt and although we wish we could turn them all in for another hand, we must play the cards that we were given in this life.  I love him dearly and losing him is something I think about but hope doesn't come about for a long time.

My grandson is 4 months old already!  What a joy he is to our family.  He loves to snuggle and laughs and coos in my arms.  If I try to put him down for a moment, he scrunches up his little face in a way that melts your heart.  My beautiful granddaughter is spunky and sweet all at the same time.  She tests mommy and daddy to the limit on a daily basis as she navigates this crazy life!  I adore her and can't wait until she can spend the night with me.  Oh the fun times we will have!  I will be spoiling her greatly and that is a promise.

I face several surgeries over the Winter months.  I will soon be getting my CMC joint on my right hand repaired so that I can regain some use.  It is to the point that I can barely grasp items, open doors or work on my jewelry projects.  The thought of being pain free is all consuming right now.  I am so allergic to pain medication that I dread the after affect of the surgery but I know that the pain I will have from that will slowly go away.  I will also be having throat surgery to repair a skin area in the back of my airway that slams shut when I breath out through my nose.  This has caused a great deal of trouble when I sleep and makes using my CPAP machine almost impossible.  The doctor stated that it will be a painful surgery at my age of 60 but thinks that he will be able to correct the issue.  This will be a great blessing!  Of course the local fire station #4 will be getting their yearly treats a little early this year as I will not have use of my hand at Christmas.  I'm pretty sure that they won't mind.  I looked back on this service that I do every year and realize that I've been doing it for 14 years!  My, how time fly's when you're having fun!

I probably won't get a vacation now for another year or so as I will have to use my PTO days for the surgeries.  Our office no longer has sick days and we end up having to use vacation days for surgery or sick days.  In about 3 to 4 more years however, I will be retiring from the Mental Health Center Case Management Team.  I am going on my 16th year now.  I am starting to weigh the possibility of retiring at 62 or 64 depending on how I feel.  I do know that I will be cutting down my hours as soon as I am able to do so.

I did a stellar job at the 2015 Montana State Fair this year.  I came back with several blue ribbons and many others.  I also received Best of Show again for my wind chimes.  Two of my items sold in the Art Hall which is quite wonderful.  I enjoy entering things in the fair.  It makes one feel quite accomplished.

Well my friends, I will close this blog for now.  I hope you have enjoyed hearing about my little life.  Always remember, your life path can go any direction.  Make sure the road you take is one that will be honoring to our gracious Lord.  He gave you this wonderful life.  If you need help steering the course, just ask Him.  He will be happy to help you paddle!  Cheers!  Freedancer

I Told Her it was a Boy!

Hello everyone!  Well, we have a new little one to add to the family.  He arrived on July 16th 2015 and weighed 7lbs 13oz.  His name is Micah Josef Wittkopp.  I was privileged to assist his coming into this world and it was a new experience to be on the outside watching it all.  He is already 1 month old and over 10lbs.

Having a grandson is so different from a granddaughter.  There is just a different feel in the air and "daddy" acts a little different as well.  You can tell just by looking in his eyes that he is anxious to start teaching this youngin all the things boy's need to know.  Sure, Lydia will always be daddy's little girl but a son carries on the name and there's a lot of pride in daddy's eyes.

We haven't figured out who he resembles yet but I can see a little of my daughter's father there...at least the bald head!  I wonder what he will become as he grows and learns about this world?  I hope he can take some good from it and bypass the bad.  I hope the world gets a little better and that the evil that has been running wild is calmed.

I hope that I can be around to see him grow and start school, graduate high school and college and marry a great gal.  I pray I am here to see his children.  For right now though, I just want to cuddle him and talk to him, make him feel safe, have him get to know me and know that I will spend the rest of my life, loving and praying for him.  He is a precious little bundle from God and we are trusted to teach him life's lessons but mostly, teach him to love Jesus as much as we do.

As always, Cheers!        Freedancer

Shake, Rattle and Roll

Hi everyone!  Holly cow, have you been following the earthquakes and erupting volcanoes around the world lately?  There is something going on big time and I think we are in for some dicey action very soon.

I have been learning all about Geology lately.  I've been checking out books and CD's about volcanoes and have found them to be fascinating! I have also been following some of the earthquakes rattling  the areas around the world.  We have a ton of volcanoes going off all around the world.  One of the most beautiful is located in Iceland.  It is located under a glacier and the glacier ice in and around the crater is slowly melting.  The lava from this volcano doesn't have a huge amount of silica so it has been putting on quite a show.

There have been some earthquakes in Southern Oregon as well that the scientists are keeping an eye on.  I wonder if we will soon see a big quake there or some other form of activity.  Only time will tell.

We were to have gone on a Big Foot hunt a few months back but it never got to take place.  I had some health issues that came up and the new cabin or should I say "money pit" kept us here in Montana.  We have been spending a great deal of time up there working on it, laying carpet and cleaning up.  The roof was seriously damaged by a hail storm and needed to be replaced.  There was so much to do at the cabin that we had a long talk and decided that we would stay home this year.  It is looking quite nice up there but be have had a very difficult time getting someone to work on the roof of the cabin and the pole barn.  Two companies pulled out at the last minute and left us without a new roof.  Then, just a few days ago, the temperature plummeted and we had snow.  None of us were ready for this to happen.  It has been bitterly cold here and we have been staying close to home.

My company sold our building and moved us across town to a cleaner and more secure location albeit we are now sharing offices 3 to 4 to a room.  It has been a challenge to not step on toes and get used to working together.  My office mates are all great and one will only be with us until January.  She has been with the Mental Health Center here in Billings Montana for over 28 years and will be retiring.  Work has been quite difficult lately.  I've had to deal with some very sick individuals and it is sometimes very hard to keep them stable.  It wouldn't be so hard if I didn't like them so much.  I have some very intelligent clients with whom I can have some very wonderful conversations with when they are stable.  Unfortunately, when they are not stable, they are very hard to manage and keep safe.

I haven't been making jewelry lately as my CMC joints are pretty messed up.  I have to wear braces at night when I sleep to keep the swelling at bay and I have to have injections every three to four months at the base of my thumbs to help with the pain.  It affects my grasping of small items so it is very hard to work with the beads and makes tearing apart the old pocket watches very painful.  Hopefully, I can get back to normal soon so that I can work on my hobbies again.

I have had some great times with my little granddaughter and there is word in the wind that another may be on the way.  We don't know for sure right now and my daughter is being closed lipped about it all.  I suspect that we will know for sure around Christmas.

We are hoping to take one small trip before bedding down for the winter. Not sure yet where we will go but we know it will be someplace warm.  The house sitter is  ready to roost as soon as we give the word.

Well everyone, I hope we won't be dealing with fire and ash here in the United States but it's all up in the air right now and with all the earthquakes and mountains going off, who knows?  Alaska is getting their fair share as I write this with Pavlof tossing her cookies!  I hope all of  you have a great Christmas and a very happy New Year!  Cheers! Freedancer

Well, happy 2014 everyone!  I thought I'd better get to blogging so you all don't think I got buried under all this crazy life has to offer.  Much has happened since the birth of our new granddaughter.  She is already a year old and gaining an attitude.  With two teachers as parents, she is one smart cookie if I do say so myself!

We have a new cabin now.  We spent much of 2013 looking around at many different cabins and locations.  We ended up three miles away from our one that burned down!  This one is much nicer and.....wait for it....has indoor plumbing!  Yes my savvy friends, not one but two bathrooms!  It also has four bedrooms which will allow us to have guests over.  It is truly a genuine log cabin.  We have been steadily working on it every chance we get, tearing out carpet, painting and decorating.  I have a tremendous amount of bare walls to hang my photos.  We ended up keeping the burned land as we now have two wood stoves to gather wood for and the seared wood will burn just fine after knocking off the blackened outer shell.

My husband finally sold his ranch near Miles City Montana.  He had been wanting to sell it for years but couldn't get his sister to agree.  She is part owner.  Finally, she stated she wanted to sell and my hubby jumped at the chance.  He has been cleaning out the old ranch house as the new owners are going to strip it to the 2X4's and rebuild.  There are some nice antiques there and my hubby has been bringing them home.  We will put a few of them at the new cabin to give it a little character.

We have purchased some furniture for the new cabin with the insurance money that my husband received for the one that burned down.  I actually found a couple of second hand chairs that really were very unique. I found a stellar rocking chair with a beautiful pattern on the head rest portion.  We also found a wonderful chair at a used furniture store that is fairly old fashioned but in great condition.  We have a couple of other older chairs that we are going to get recovered and repaired.  One is a rocker from the 1800's!

You have to understand a little about this new cabin to get the jest of the type of furniture that we want to decorate with.  This cabin was built in 1983 so it really isn't that old.  In 1992 it was purchased by a man and his wife who basically wanted to reside there "off the grid" so to speak.  This man was not a friend of the US government and he did not believe in paying his taxes so the IRS took ownership of the cabin in 1993.  However, no one would go up and get the current squatter out of the cabin so he kept living there.  In late 1993, the man had three other men move in with him.  His wife had left him so he had lots of room.  The four of them started a movement in Montana called "The Montana Freemen".  They resided in the cabin until September of 1995 when they moved out and went up to Jordan Montana where the "Freemen 81 Day Standoff" took place.  So as you can see, we purchased a little piece of Montana History!  I have spent some time researching what went on at our new cabin during those years they were there.  There was quite a bit of counterfeiting and had they all stayed there, the Freemen Standoff would have been at our cabin instead of Jordan.  They named our cabin "Redemption Township" and the Jordan Montana location was named "Justus Township".  It's kinda cool knowing our cabin had a history even though I would never condone or believe what the Freemen preached and lived.  We actually purchased the cabin from a retired minister and his wife who resided there for 12 years before they decided they wanted to move into Billings.  We actually had gone and looked at it once before we looked around for a while more.  However, we were both drawn back to this quirky cabin and just knew that we had to have it.  Although my hubby constantly states "there is nothing square in this cabin" as he measures spaces and thinks about what he wants to do with them.

We have quite a few plans for this new cabin.  We are hoping to make it a place that we can go if the "you know what" hits the fan some day.  My hubby is going to have his ham radio tower there and we are going to try to install solar and wind power as alternative emergency power sources.  We are excited about this endeavor and I will keep you well informed of our progress.

We are planning our first and only trip of 2014.  My hubby has gotten to know a man from Washington State who knows a great deal about Bigfoot.  Now my husband is quite sure that these creatures exist.  He believes that he heard one at one time and has had a bucket list desire to go on a hunt.  He has been invited to join this man in Washington to do a little hunt and we are very up for this!  After all, one can combine two favorite pastimes, Geocaching and Bigfoot hunting!  We are only taking one trip due to the fact that we have a lot of important work to do on the cabin and cannot afford to let it sit too long.  We want to have wood cut and all the improvements done on the inside by the time Winter rolls around.

Well, that is my update for this year so far.  I am sure there will be many other interesting things to report as the rest of the year flies by. I truly hope all of you have a great Summer and a safe one as well.  Cheers for now!  Freedancer